May 22, 2007 9:05 pm

Indulge Me. Please.

I’m trying as hard as I can to not talk about wedding stuff contantly. I think I’m doing a decent job. It’s just that everything I’ve read seems to claim that if you don’t have every single detail taken care of a year in advance, you’re doomed and you won’t have a dress or a cake or a location or a photographer and you’ll die sad and alone. And I find that incredibly sensationalist and idiotic, and I’m trying to strike a good balance between bringing it up at every opportunity and ignoring it, hoping it’ll plan itself.

Did you know that between inviting only immediate family, plus aunts, uncles, cousins, and grandparents, we are already pushing 75 guests? That is a lot of people. I honestly have no idea how big this shindig will end up being. We’d like a small-ish wedding, but one that includes our closest family and friends. I’d really rather not invite those people my parents have known forever but with whom I’m not especially close to, but inevitably they will have invited my parents to their kids’ weddings and I know I’m going to feel obligated. Argh. Will do my best to avoid that.

The one thing neither of us is willing to budge on is having a non-religious ceremony. I am not going to stand in front of hundreds of people and lie to all of them. Not going to do it. I would much rather have a Justice of the Peace officiate the ceremony and be able to be perfectly honest in front of everyone I love. That’s probably hard for some people to deal with (namely my grandparents, who are all good, church-going people), and I know I will catch a lot of flak from my family about it, but I can’t do it. I’m not willing to compromise on that.

As far as other details, for colors I’m thinking a nice, springy green would be just lovely. Actually, I saw these decorations somewhere (can’t for the life of me think of where, but I’m pretty sure it was a wedding website) and I FELL IN LOVE WITH THEM and I think I might insist on having something like this:

Birch Decorations

They’re just so… fresh! And natural! I love that the two middle ones look suspiciously like broccoli. Hee. I figure by going this route, we’ll probably save money on flowers too – how expensive can broccoli be? Just kidding. But I do think these sorts of foliage would be cheaper than importing some rare, exotic orchid from Hawaii. Also? My family is incredibly handy and I am sure they have a birch tree lying about the place somewhere that we could repurpose for decorations.

Are books helpful in planning weddings? I am feeling a bit lost at the moment. I don’t have opinions about much of anything yet, especially anything involving dresses. I just know that I don’t want something skanky or partially see-through (YES I HAVE SEEN THEM and they are BAD) and I don’t understand why all dresses are strapless. I love strapless dresses, personally, and I think they look very nice, but I am afraid I will look like I am made entirely of boobs and also? Can you imagine trying to find a dress that will fit me? I nearly have nightmares about it. My mom made her own wedding dress and I am seriously considering having her make mine as well just to avoid the horrors of trying on mass-produced dresses that will inevitably be three feet too long.

GAH. Thank you for indulging me. I haven’t really talked to anybody about my plans because 1) I don’t want to be THAT GIRL who thinks everyone is just dying to hear about her wedding plans when really, no one is; and 2) I feel pretentious. Of course, I also feel pretentious saying “fiancé” so there you have it. I never said I wasn’t weird.

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  • EmmanuelD says:

    You managed to say “wedding” 7 times in a single post. I’m uterly pleased to grant you a “I say Wedding whenever I want” award.

    (the things is: I feel quite old when a girl who is 10 yo younger than me speak about wedding. So you also deserve a “I’m younger, and I annoy Emmanuel because he’s just unable to find a suitable woman” award.)

    Did I say that congratulation for your wedding? And see you later on the buffet ;)

  • Meagan says:

    PLEASE, talk about it more. we are DYING for details!

  • Melissa says:

    I have a feeling I’ll be getting engaged within the next year or so (hoping!) and, when the thought crosses my mind, I get kinda stressed about things as well…mostly because of what everyone else says about time frames and what not. I definitely empathize with you, blah.

    Wow, 75 already! That’s a lot…just don’t let your parents muscle you into inviting all of “their friends”…unless they’d like to pay for the extra costs! :D Haha! That’s the deal I will make with my parents, since I’m not sure if they’re going to help me out yet or not.

    It’s good that you don’t want to bend your beliefs for your family, that’s cool! But it is your wedding and your time, it should definitely be planned your way!

    Omg! Those “shrubberies” (?) are lovely! I’ve never seen something like that as wedding decorations, but it’s very unique and fresh, I agree.

    I really wish I could offer you some actual advice about planning, because I can only imagine how stressful it can become. =/ I guess all I can say is just be true to yourself…oh how cliche, blah. :P Hehe…but yeah, don’t be bullied. That’s my biggest fear, myself…I hope I don’t get bullied either.

    Good luck with all the planning! :D And no worries, talk about your wedding all you want…hey it’s your life and your blog! I understand how you feel about not being “that girl”, don’t worry you aren’t! :D

    Woo, long comment, hehe. ^_^

  • Jenny says:

    Those are the things that I know I’ll worry about, too! :P

    You know, you should totally watch some no-brainer wedding films, to like.. I don’t know. I recommend ‘Because I Said So’ because it’s cute.

    Of course, then again you may be too busy to watch films. xD

    I like the spring green colour scheme, I think that’ll look really good.

    Congratulations, by the way and good luck with your plans. :)

  • Sleeper says:

    I honestly don’t know anything. When/if I get married I don’t want a huge wedding. Maybe just “us” and few witnesses in the church and then a restaurant dinner or whatever.

    You should watch some movies with wedding themes so you can get some ideas for..stuff ;)

  • Geo says:

    You’re freaking me out.

  • Andrea says:

    I’m getting married in July, and believe me, I ran in to some of the same issues as you’re talking about, such as the non-religious ceremony. We came up with a few ideas of our own, because civil ceremonies tend to be quite short.

    But if you’d like to talk about any wedding planning, let me know :)