August 1, 2006 9:19 pm


:note: Type O Negative – “Stay Out Of My Dreams”

Today I had to get up early after staying up late. My walk to school left me with blisters on the bottoms of my feet from my new shoes. I spent over eight hours in front of a computer screen only to walk home and sit down at the computer again to do homework.

Sitting there, I realized that I haven’t taken a good photo of myself in quite a while. I have a few favorites, but they’re all from over a year ago. The recent ones depict how I’ve felt recently – I’ve got purple shadows under my eyes, a perpetual blank look in my eyes that makes me seem lifeless or unanimated, like the spark has left. I’m not genuinely smiling. I was miserable in this photo and trying to fake like I wasn’t.

The photo on my MySpace profile (up until a minute ago) was from ages ago, and a friend recently asked if I had lost, like, thirty pounds or something because, WOW. It was meant to be a compliment, but as I was explaining that the photo was old, I just sort of stopped. I haven’t really gained or lost any weight since that photo was taken (maybe five pounds here or there – I don’t own a scale) – it’s just a great angle. But I got to thinking that I haven’t really taken any photos of myself that I’ve actually liked in a long, long time.

I grabbed my camera, stepped into the bathroom (best light in the apartment), and began shooting.

I finally got one I liked.


It made my day.

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