A Post In Which I Try To Be Funny

The Beach Boys – “Good Vibrations”

Today is a gorgeous day. Sunny, mid-60’s, lovely. I am celebrating by, um, sitting inside in the dark, listening to Marilyn Manson. I am nothing if not appropriate. Actually, I am importing a Beach Boys CD onto my computer as we speak, a CD that I will listen to in its entirety instead of creepy non-Beach Boys music because IT IS THE BEACH BOYS and it is warm outside. Summer is nearly upon us. And, hey! That means my birthday is nearly upon us. Except not so much, because first there is Callie’s birthday and then Paul’s. (Which, by the way Paul, um, if you happen to do anything cool on the exact date of your birthday, I may not be able to make it, as my brother is graduating from high school and I am taking the train home to be there for it, and yes I am a bad person but I can’t help it, I didn’t schedule his graduation.)

Anyway.

Things of interest that have happened lately: um, nothing! I am a boring person and I lead a boring life. No crises (crisises?), injuries, mice, plagues, nothing. I went bowling yesterday and scored an 80-something and then a 103. A nice boy named Brandon asked me about my school and my major and was not an asshole like that one girl who was an asshole that one time I went bowling. He asked all the right questions and was appropriately excited for me when I mentioned that I will be graduating in TWO TERMS. Yes, you heard me right. TWO. After June, I will have six more months of school and then I am DONE. I am paralyzingly terrified of this fact. Lately I have been having thoughts like, “GAH, school! Why can’t you go away and be OVER WITH ALREADY?” and “I hate homework!” and immediately after any of these sorts of thoughts I start pleading with my brain, like, “No, no, no, I didn’t mean it, I love school! Keep me here forever! I will take General Studies classes until I die. I will even re-take a History of Material Cultures class if it means I don’t have to graduate yet! PLEASE SAY IT ISN’T SO.” But it is, and I will be done mid-December-ish if all goes well.

Did I ever tell you how my grades came out last term? I think I did not. I got all As and, in a hilarious-yet-ironic twist of fate, I ended up with a C+ in my C++ class. Everybody else I talked to got a C+ as well, except for one person who got a D and one who got an F. I feel very bad for those people, because I like them very much and they are very nice people. That class sucked and I am glad to be done with it. I shall never touch C++ again as long as I live.

I am currently eating some SweetTarts Gummy Bunnies, because nothing says Easter like eating sugary rabbits. We didn’t really acknowledge Easter this year – except for the candy-buying – because Daniel and I are not particularly religious and because my own mother did not send me any candy in the mail. She said she thought about it, but then didn’t get around to it. Ha. Thanks Mom. She said she might think about sending me some candy after it goes on sale after Easter, but I have yet to receive anything so I doubt she got around to it. I joke about this with my mom because she works night shift at the local hospital and is therefore a zombie most days after she works, and I know she has a legitimate reason for not getting around to things. However, Mother, I would sort of like my sunglasses and Paul’s beanie back in a relatively timely fashion, if at all possible, since it has now been three weeks that we have been home from spring break and, um, that stuff is still not home. Thanks! -Your daughter.

I’ve taken to identifying myself as “your daughter” when I call home, because on more than one occasion my mother has not immediately recognized my voice when she answers the phone and I like to make fun of her about it. Mom picks up and says, “Hello?” and I say, “Hi. This is your daughter.” and she says, “Oh, ah ha ha, good. Hi.” It works out nicely.

Um, I will be participating in a blood drive on May 1st! Giving blood is a cool thing to do, man. The postcard I got about it has a nice looking couple on the front, with a dog, and they are sitting in a park. The captions above them read: “Matt has a giving nature.” and “Mia donates blood because Matt invites her along.” (It doesn’t say anything about the dog.) This says to me, “Matt is a very good person and he has angel wings and a halo and Mia would not have ever thought to donate blood except Matt dragged her along once and she didn’t want to be sitting there forever with nothing to do, so she agreed to donate blood too.” That makes me laugh. Um, so yes, I will be giving blood and getting a sticker and eating some cookies and then going to TWO CLASSES because I am hardcore like that. Actually, I just hate missing class.

Ehh, is there anything you want me to write about? I am running out of ideas. I don’t have any cute pets to talk about, no kids, no life… Hm. I wore a skirt today because it was so warm. I have met all the members of the band The Cherry Poppin’ Daddies and have all their autographs. I like pears.

I also like The Beach Boys.

File Under: Family, General, Personal, School

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